Holding onto a chance so slim or waiting on a miscarriage. I feel like I need to be realistic and that holding onto a little hope is just my attempt to push off *all* the pain until later when we will know "for sure." I'm definitely grieving right now, but I'm sure it would be worse if I were bleeding right now as well, bleeding makes it final. Without the bleeding I can still hope, it's almost not real. I've also read success stories online with low numbers not doubling resulting in healthy pregnancies, that an ultrasound is better diagnostically after 5 weeks for viability than hCG tests. Also it's suppose to double in 48-72 (some even say 96) hours, mine went up ~20% in 48, so there is a little wiggle room there too. I know I'm grasping, but it's all I can do.
I have an ultrasound appointment next Thursday at 2:30. It's going to be a LONG week, that is, if nothing happens in the meantime.
I can't imagine how frustrating and exhausting being in this place must be. The not knowing 100% is the hardest, but it seems like there is still hope. Hang in there, I am praying that the numbers lie and this little baby will be a miracle!!
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